Funniest Moments of May 2010!
by ChipmunksChipettes4Ever
Summary: Sit back, relax, and enjoy reading the funniest Alvin and the Chipmunk moments of the month of May in the year 2010!


****

Hey people whats up! Now I have been thinking about this for some time and thought it would be fun to do every month! Tell me what you think!

**And this is kind of clearing my mind for getting the next chapter up for Rocking At Chipmunk High! Being co-written with AbigailSeville24 as of right now.**

**P.S. This story will include moments that are a little before May 2010. I just really want to put them in!**

**P.S.S. Oh yeah, and this might take a while to read! I hope you make it through! XD**

**So anyway...here are the Funniset Moments Of May 2010!**

**Are We Family?**

"It's Mrs. Miller." She said softly.

Alvin, Simon, Theodore, and Dave gasped. "What's wrong?"

"She, she, she…" Jeanette stumbled on what to say.

"Is Getting married?"

"Lost all her Money gambling?"

"Lost the house?"

"She was eaten by a crocodile?" Alvin exclaimed. Every turned to look at Alvin.

"Just a guess." he chuckled.

...

I don't care what she says but were not leaving L.A!"

"Why?" Alvin said cuddling next to her, wiggling his eye brow. "Would you miss me to much?"

"No you little rodent." she told him in a calm know-it-all tone.

...

"Well what can we do?" Ellie asked. Everyone in the room. They all sat in silence as they all pondered about the situation.

"Hey, I just thought of an idea!" Alvin exclaimed.

"You were thinking?" Brittany said shocked. "I thought I smelled smoke…"

...

"Can we Dave? Please oh please!" they batted their eyelashes and gave Dave the look of a sad, desperate puppy.

"Whoa!" Alvin yelled. He dragged the chipettes out of the house and slammed the screen door on them as they sat on the back porch.

"Hey!"

...

"Look! She's already taken over the couch." Alvin exclaimed pointed to Jeanette. Her and Simon gave him a confused look. "But let me warn you girls." Alvin said sitting on the top of the couch. "Your no longer guests. Your family. So that means each of you is one of the guys and you'll be treated like family." Than Alvin put his bottom near Jeanette's face and passed gas.

"Alvin!" Simon and Dave shouted. Eleanor and Brittany shared disgusted looks as Jeanette covered her mouth and nose with her hands. She leaned over and began coughing. She sat, fanning her self, her face red.

Simon patted her on the back. "Congratulations, you're a Seville!"

...

"Oh sorry!" She whispered. "She went under her blankets and continued speaking loudly into the phone. The other boys couldn't hear anything that was going on but Alvin could hear the hole conversation.

"OMG!…yeah I'm living here now…same room…OMG not like that!…dump him hard…oh no we can go to the mall early any thing is okay…really that early?…yeah maybe we should get breakfast I don't really care what we eat…really pancakes? Whatever…hey did you see that new dress in the window if Macy's?"

It was now 2:30am and frankly Alvin had had enough. He picked up a pillow from off the floor and hit Brittany hard with it.

"Ow! Got to go!" she hung up the phone and laid back to bed.

...

He half awake, looked up and saw that Eleanor's hamster Rosie was running on her little wheel. He groaned as the small animal continued to run faster as his annoyance grew.

"Please stop. Please stop. Please stop." He said through clenched teeth. Rosie stopped and began drinking water which created a bubbly sound. Than went right back to running on her wheel. Theodore groaned and flopped back down on his bed waking up Ellie.

"Morning Theo. What's wrong?" She asked calmly.

"Nothing, it's just that Rosie is making a lot of noise."

"Oh my bad I forgot to feed her last night. I'll just feed her and she should stop running around. Okay." Eleanor said sweetly.

"Thank you." Theodore said lying down.

"Hi, Rosie! And how are you doing today?" Eleanor playfully asked scratching behind Rose's ear. She filled up the little yellow bowl and closed the cage as she made her way back to bed.

"Better?" she asked wile she was lying down next to him.

"Super." She smiled as she flipped her body and shut her eyes. Unfortunately the sound of Rosie running was replaced by the irritating sound of her chewing. "Ugh what did I do?" Theodore buried his head down in his pillow trying to enjoy the remainder of his sleep.

...

The three chipmunks sat at the table looking up at Dave. "Look, I know that you three aren't so happy about the makeover that the girls did to the house but they spent all day working on it. Sure It's a little feminine but-"

"A little?" the three chimed in.

"Dave they put a doily on the couch. The couch!" Simon exclaimed.

...

They were almost to the finish line when they heard a loud voice behind them.

"Hey! You two!" Brittany and Alvin looked behind them to see a the security guard behind them blowing his whistle.

"Oh snap!" they said at the same time. The six continued running as the guard began chasing them around.

* * *

**Ab Ovo, From the Egg**

"Thank you," Jeanette said, and kissed Simon on the cheek. She picked up her fork to begin eating the delicious-looking scrambled eggs when Simon's voice stopped her.

"Be careful! I, uh, um…I kind of dropped a…er…a pebble in the mix. By accident. It was too hot to fish out." Simon mentally slapped himself. A _pebble_? Of all the things he could have said…

**(A/N: I know more things were probably funny in this story, but I was just too lazy and I HAD to get this stupid story up already!)**

* * *

**Dumb Blonde Jokes**

The crowd was still silent. Simon began to laugh, Melody stared at him.

"You want Alvin to die of embarrassment?" Simon whispered.

"Oh yeah." Melody said with enjoyment. Alvin began to sweat,

"Ugh….."

"Hey!" Angel screamed. "Tell better jokes."

...

"Okay." Alvin said. "This one goes out to my blonde of a sister Melody." Melody stared at him. "The other day we were playing Black Jacks. I yelled HIT ME! SO SHE PUNCHED ME IN THE FACE!" The crowd was once again laughing. "Charlene is another blonde to add to the dumb list. What happens if she pulls the pin? RUN SHE STILL HAS THE GERNADE!" People were rolling on the floors. "Oh and Eleanor, remember you, Melody, and Charlene went to those train tracks? Melody said they look like deer tracks, Charlene said they looked like badger tracks and you went to them and said no, they look like…CRASH! Did it hurt when the train hit you?" Eleanor was steaming hot!

...

"HEY FOLKS, blondes are dumb, remember their dumb. There was this blonde, brunette, and a red head, and they were stuck on this island in front of a magic mirror. The mirror could grant them one wish. The red head wished that she was smarter so she could get off the island and she built a raft and got off the island. The brunette wished she was back home. She was back in a matter of seconds. The blonde comes up to the mirror and says, I've always been dumb all my life, I wish I was smarter and she turned into a man." The crowd burst with laughter. Melody, Eleanor, and Charlene all got up. Melody raised her hand.

"Yes blonde of a sister." Alvin said.

...

"Hey folks, I'm a dumb blonde as you know. There's one thing missing to that magic mirror on the island though."

"Really Melody?" Charlene and Eleanor sarcastically said.

"Yeah, if the blonde wished she was dumber she would turn into Alvin." The crowd was laughing so hard. "Oh and that isn't as funny as I told you about Alvin watching spaghetti. One day I was cooking spaghetti and I had to go and help Simon with this new experiment. SO I asked Alvin if he could watch the spaghetti. I go and help Si for about 30 minutes and I heard an explosion. I run with Simon to the kitchen where I find that the spaghetti had exploded. Alvin is just standing there. Simon yells you were supposed to be watching the spaghetti and Alvin replied I am." Melody then showed an imitation of a person staring cheerfully at spaghetti. The crowd roared with laughter.

"That's not all." Charlene said grabbing the microphone. "How do you confuse Alvin? Tell him to pee in the corner of a curricular room. How does he confuse you? When he says he's done." The crowd banged fist while laughing. "Oh, and there was this one day Alvin went to the library. He checked out a book and the next day, he brings it back. He said to the Liberian, this book is too hard and confusing. It has way too many characters and way too many numbers. The Liberian leans over to the other and says, Dang so that's the boy who took our phone book." More laughs from the crowd.

"Now speaking of magic mirrors." Eleanor said taking the microphone from Charlene. "There was one at this candy shop and you can't tell a lie in front of it or you get sucked in. Simon goes to the mirror and says I think I'm one of the smartest kids in the world. He didn't get sucked in. Theodore comes to the mirror and says I think I'm too fat. He got sucked in. Alvin comes to the mirror and says I think and he got sucked in." The crowd was losing their guts from laughing. "The first day my sisters and I got the Wii, the boys and Melody came over to our house. It was Alvin and I in boxing. We were already and the game said fight so he began beating me. I fell down and yelled WHAT WAS THAT FOR? It said fight. NOT LITERLALLY!" The crowd had reached its point of laughing and the announcer came out.

"Now how about these lovely ladies be on our next episode of Comedy Kid?" The announcer said.

"YEAH!" Alvin walked off the stage while hearing the clapping of the audience and he went by Theodore.

"You know Alvin." Theodore said. "This is what you get for calling a blonde dumb."

**(A/N: Yeah it was long, but funny right!)**

**

* * *

**

10 Ways To Annoy The Chipmunks And The Chipettes

_Ask him, "Do you believe in ghosts?" If he says "Yes," then yell "BOO!" every 5 minutes. If he says "No," then tell him he's wrong over and over again._

_..._

_Die his hair green and blue striped, and say that it's the Chipmunks' colours. When he asks about red, cut in and say "Don't get me started on that worthless colour..."_

_..._

_Poke him in the back of the head constantly, then point at Brittany when he turns around._

_..._

_Ask him if the 'A' on his sweater stands for 'A$$'. _

_..._

_Bribe Alvin to make out with Jeanette. Make sure Simon's there, but Brittany's not... _

_..._

_Call him "Mini Harry Potter". _

_..._

_Ask him why everyone loves him so much. Then when he answers, scream "OH, WHATEVER!". **(A:N This one got me rolling on the floor with laughter!)**_

_..._

_Call him a "Chip-nerd". _

_..._

___Have Alvin kiss Eleanor in front of him. (Tip: Make sure Brittany's not there!) _

_..._

_Tell him that there's a cookie sale outside, watch him run out, then laugh because you lied._

_..._

_Call him a "cookie monster". _

_..._

_Call his cell phone and hang up 30 times. _

_..._

_Ask her, "Why are you so bossy?" to her face. _

_..._

_Tell her, "Why is it always YOU that sings all the songs while your sisters sing BACKUP? I mean, in the CHIPMUNKS, Alvin, Simon, and Theodore get to sing a part. *Cough* *Cough* RUDE *Cough* *Cough*" _

_..._

_Step on her toes constantly, and when she confronts you, say, "Wear shoes...it's not my fault your feet are so BIG!" _

_..._

_When she's asleep, draw "Harry Potter" glasses on her with black Magic Marker. Or permanent if you're brave enough... _

_..._

_Steal her glasses and blame Brittany_

_..._

_Make Brittany do something bad, then bring popcorn and watch them fight. Also, cheer: "Brittany! Brittany! Brittany!". _

_..._

_Quietly say, "Theodore told me to tell you this: he's dumping you for a skinny girl." then say, "KIDDING!" and remind her how she fell for it. _

_..._

_Call her a "Big butterball". _

**_(A/N: I'm pretty sure you all know which ones annoy which chipmunk and/or chipette)_**

* * *

**Misadventures**

However, Alvin, was laying upside down, mouth hanging open, snoring loudly, whip cream all over his face from the waffles they had for dinner.

Padamay smirked and snapped a picture with her phone. That was going on Myspace.

**_..._**

The house was filled with annoyed sleepy groans. "What _is _that?" Simon asked, rubbing his eyes. Padamay shrugged as she turned a lamp on and rubbed her own eyes. The chipettes and the other munks followed, groaning and growling at being awakened.

"Alright," Alvin said standing up on the couch. "Who wants to die?"

...

Alvin and Brittany were the first to respond to Jeanette and Simon's call. "Smart munks, this is hot munks, over," There was static on the other line before an answer. "Alvin, open the front door! That's where it's going!" Alvin and Brittany complied and ran over to the door.

"Wait," Brittany said staring up at the door knob. "We're six inch chipmunks! We can't get up there!" She snatched the walky out of Alvin's paws. "Padamay?"

"Yo, yo, who died?" Padamay replied. "I heard screaming."

...

"A few townsmen went out into a field where the light was and saw Bloody Mary standing beside a tree holding a magic wand-"

"So she's like...the tooth fairy or something?"

"No Alvin," Padamay said. "Just listen." He pouted and listened.

...

The men of the town got pitchforks and guns and ran towards her. Bloody Mary heard them and broke of her spell and ran into the woods."

"Chicken," Brittany muttered.

...

"And to this day, anyone stupid enough to chant her name three times before a mirror in the dark, Bloody Mary's spirit will come and tear their bodies to pieces and rip out their souls-!"

"Okay Dave, I think they've had enough," Padamay caught him off, giving him a look. She glanced down at the shaking and whimpering chipmunks, their eyes so wide Padamay thought they would pop out.

...

Alvin tossed in his sleeping bag, snooring loudly. "Hey Dave...what's for breakfast?" He muttered in his sleep, turning again. "Yeah...the awesome one..." He grinned to himself. A sudden breeze made him shiver and snap his eyes open.

...

"I ssssseeeeeeeeee yoooooooooou,"

Alvin dug his heels into the dirt, abrutly stopping and his brothers ran into him. "Oof!" They all grunted as they fell. "Alvin!" Simon groaned as he rubbed his head.

"Dude, did you hear that?"

They listened.

"I sssssseeeeeeeee yooooooou,"

"THAT!" Alvin yelled. He turned to his brothers who had raised eyebrows. "Uh, Alvin, I _really _recomend you stop drinking those energy drinks..." Theodore nodded in agreement. "Yeah, we don't hear anything.

"HOW CAN YOU NOT HEAR THAT!" He shreaked.

"I ssssseeeeeeeeee yoooooooooo-"

"I KNOW YOU SEE ME!" Alvin replied, yelling up at the trees.

...

"Sup, Alvin," She said casually. "How's it goin'?"

"Y-y-you," He pointed at her, then Brittany, then her sisters, then back at Padamay. Relaization struck him.

"Oh you have _got _to be kidding me!"

...

"Hmm..." _Couldn't hurt, could it? _"Bloody Mary, Bloody Mary, Bloody Mary." He stared at himself in the mirror and his reflection was the only thing that looked at him.

"Ha," He said. "I knew-"

"AAAAAAAAHHHHH!" A scream/groan sounded. Alvin fell from the sink wit ha scream and looked aorund in fear. Suddenly the shower door flew open and a slim figure stood before him. Alvin squinted his eyes and looked closer. Rage filled him.

"PADAMAY!"

...

"Woooooow," Alvin said as he had his brothers jumped up onto the counter. The pie was deflated and burned to a crisp. Simon chuckled nervously, "Well, there is always take out," He suggested.

Dave sighed heavily. "Why is it that whatever I touch burns?"

The chipmunks took a big step back.

...

Dave smiled to himself. He never saw Alvin smile bigger then when he was with Brittany. Or unless he was pranking someone, but still, that was a different smile. An evil grin, yeah that was it.

...

"Wow Tobe-ster!" Padamay said brightly. "Someone's beaten your record!"

"I _choose _not to have a girlfriend, Pad," Toby explained. "Girls are just something far to complicated for my busy life."

"HA!" Her and the chipettes coughed.

...

Padamay turned to him and punched him hard in the arm before smiling. "Here Toby, I know you want some," She held the plant over herself and her brother. "Oh no," Toby shook his head at his smirking sister. "I'm good, I'm good-"

"No, I don't think you are," She slowly walked towards him like a preditor. "Rules are rules."

"Screw rules!" He yelled before she went into a run and chased him out the door.

**(A/N: I don't know why, but I seriously almost fell out of the chair reading this!)**

...

"Why?"

"Just do it!" She stared at him. He groaned again. _"Please?" _

"That's what I thought," She replied as she quietly walked over towards Jeanette as Simon reached her.

Alvin pulled out the mistletoe and held it over their heads.

"Woops!" He said loudly, making both of them look up. "How'd that get there?"

Simon growled at him. "Alvin," He muttered through his teeth. "Gotta go!" Alvin dashed off Padamay's shoulder and was gone.

...

Theodore, all innocently, said, "In the kitchen helping Dave, why?"

Alvin helped him up with a smile. "I think you should go and help her, don't you?"

"Uh-"

"Yeah, I thought so to," Alvin said as he practically dragged him into the kitchen.

...

"Set timer for three minuets," She said, and he repeated what she said and did so when Alvin and Theodore joined her.

"Jump around and sing 'shake your groove thing'_._"

Once again, Dave repeated what Alvin requested, and spun around in a circle and sang the first verse before stopping and glaring at two chipmunks and a chipette that were laughing.

...

"No!"

"Oh, c'mon Padamay!"

_"No!"_

"Just a little-"

_Smack!_

"Ooooow!"

...

Alvin held up the shiny key with a Ford insignia on the part people usually held it. "Uh, what's it go to?"

"Toby's car."

Her brother turned to her so quick he could have gotten whiplash. His face was covered in horror and anger. "Why did you give the rodent my keys?"

...

"No, Si," Alvin said. "I think he means _Monster Energy. _You know, black can with a spikey M on the front? _Unleash the beast?"_

Padamay's eyes got wide. "How many did you have, Toby?"

"Two...four...six...eight. You suck, I'm great!" He giggled like a little girl and looked up at the lights above them and gasped. "Pretty!" He grinned then gasped. "Dude, I can't breathe." He collapsed, twiching on the ground.

..

He thought for a moment. "Is it called Pet_'s_mart or Pet_S_mart?"

Everyone thought for a second. "Pet'smart, I think."

"No, it's PetSmart."

"But there's that little ball between the t and the s, indicating a comma." Simon said.

"No, it's just a ball." Brittany said.

"I disagree, Brittany," Jeanette told her. "Why would they put the ball bouncing there instead of somewhere like betweeen the...M and the A?"

"Because then it would look stupid." Eleanor said.

The arguement continued on and Alvin sighed with a roll of his eyes. Then he got a thought and smiled. For once, he didn't start the argument!

...

Padamay laughed. "I think she's trying to talk like you, Alvin."

Alvin's eyes slightly narrowed. Then he smirked. "Hey there, Silver."

"Hey there, Silver!" The bird repeated.

His smirk got wider. "Alvin's the greatest!"

"Alvin's the greatest!"

"Dave's a-"

Padamay poked him in the shoulder and glared at him.

...

"Hi there," She said in a soft voice. "I'm Julie. I'm guessing your Toby Seville?" Toby nodded mutly. She grinned and glanced at his sister. "Hey Padamay."

"Sup Jules."

Toby snapped his head to her. "Wait, you know her?" He asked frantically. Padamay nodded. "Yeah, she babysitted me when you left." _Curses, _Toby thought. _I knew I shouldn't have left!_

"So, you ready?" Julie asked, rocking back and forth. The chipmunks and Padamay pushed him forward making him sputter slightly. He glared at them, his sister blowing him a kiss smugly. Julie waved at her and got in the driver's side of the veheacle.

Toby got in the passengers side and nodded at them. Alvin smirked as the car rolled away. "Hey Toby!" He called, cupping his hands around his mouth. Toby rolled down the window. Alvin smirked up at Padamay and she caught on, along with everyone else.

"One...Two...Three." Then eveyone exclaimed...

"WE LOVE YOU TOBY!"

"SHUT UP!"

...

His sons clapped for him and he slowly ate the cupcake with a slight grimace. "So," Alvin said as he jumped up onto the bed, followed by his brothers. "When's the party?" Dave waited until the taste went down to say, "Party? There is no party, Alvin."

Silence.

Dave looked down to see Alvin, Simon, and Theodore's jaws dropped clear to the floor. He raised an eyebrow before Alvin pounced on him and grabbed onto him by his collar.

"ARE YOU SERIOUS?" He yelled face to face with Dave. "No party? That's like...! Well NO PARTY!" Dave sighed and yanked Alvin's claws out of his shirt, placing him on the bed. "Well, I'm forty, guys." They just stared blankly at him. "You don't really have birthday parties at that age."

Silent stares were all he got.

...

"Why not give him a chipmunk and chipette theme?" Brittany said, a proud smirk on her face. Padamay shrugged, giving it a moment to consider. "Well, that could work." She scanned over the plates that were plastered with the signature poses of the 'munks and 'ettes. "I like it."

"Of _course, _you like it." Alvin said with a roll of his eyes.

...

The door opened and the light flickered on. Everyone jumped up and yelled, "Surprise!"

**"OH MY GOD!" **Dave shrilled and fell back against the door frame. He fell down onto the floor, panting heavily and clutching his chest. His eyes were so wide they looked like they would fall out.

He slowly turned to Padamay and Alvin who were rolling on the floor laughing. "Okay," Padamay panting, wipping a tear away. "I _can _get a laugh at Dave's face!"

...

Dave glanced up at her and she showed him her scabbed needle poked fingers with a wince. Dave grimaced and turned back to them. Alvin rocked back and forth on his heels. "So yeah, we just thought-"

He was cut off by Dave hugging all three of them tightly to him. "Thanks guys," He said. "I really appreciate it. All of this." The munks smiled.

Simon whispered, "So what do you think he's going to do when he finds out all of those patches are made out of his clothes?"

"What was that, Si?" Dave asked.

"Nothing!"

...

"It's okay. But uh...I was wondering if I could uh...bring some..." She cleared her throat. "Friends."

Her mom pursed her lips and narrowed her eyes. "What kind of friends?"

"Just...friends."

"Are these friends human, Padamay?"

"..."

...

"I haven't been eathier," Padamay told her. "I mean if I wanted to see a bunch of old stuff I could just come here."

"I heard that!" Dave called from somewhere in the house.

"You were supossed to!" His neice called back.

...

"Wow," Dave said with raised eyebrows. "That is a shocker."

"Yeah, but I think your going to have some new buddies in the nut house." Alvin said.

"Why do you say that?"

"Well, Dave," Alvin sighed. "Let's just say that people are going to have trouble being in the room with a stuffed animal from now on."

...

There were two things anyone should fear in the world of the chipmunks.

Number one: An angry Brittany.

And number two: A smirking Dave.

Common sense.

...

Padamay glanced at her over the magazine. "Let me guess. He made out with a fan girl?"

"No-"

"Told you, you were to 'fluffy' for him?"

"No-"

"You think you don't talk enough anymore?"

_"No-"_

"You talk to much?"

_"NO-"_

"Just being Alvin?"

"NO!" Brittany yelled, breathing hard for air after her outburst. "Oh wait," She thought. "Yeah, just being Alvin, pretty much." Padamay chuckled and shook her head as she flipped idly through pages. "Sweetie, you should have realized that Alvin was going to be Alvin the day you met him.

...

"Your never do nothing wrong, your Alvin, _The Alvinator!" _He reminded himself.

"_Alvinator?" _Dave muttered.

"Don't question it," Simon replied.

...

She smirked evily into the camara once more, as if she _knew _he was watching.

Alvin's jaw was dropped clear to the floor. He had never been 'told off' before like that.

"Duuuuuude," Simon laughed. "She _owns _you!"

"SHUT UP, SIMON!"

...

"Mission Accomplished," Toby said triumphantly with a commercial grin.

Padamay gave him a look. "Please don't make that your catch phrase," She begged. "That's almost as bad as _The Alvinator..."_

_..._

Padamay burst through the door of Dave Seville's home with the chipmunks and chipettes at her feet. Dave wherled around from the microwave as Toby and his mother looked up from the table. The teenager at the entrence was a complete black stiluette until lightning blasted behind her, reviling a hunched over trembling Padamay. Her hands were curled into fists, her jaw set while the six chipmunks looked like her little demon minions with the same stance.

Toby swallowed nervously as he remembered what he had _forgot _to remember. "Oh...uh.." He stood and backed away slowly. "H-Hey Pad-"

"I'M GONNA KILL YOU!"

Toby shrieked and scramed with Padamay on his tail. She chased him around the entire house until he collapsed to the ground when Padamay jumped on his back. She slapped the back of his head and pulled on his ears and twisted, making him shout_, "MOMMY!"_

**_(A:N: *sigh* Oh, Toby...)_**

_..._

When they got outside, there was an assortment of many different kinds of cars.

Rusted, rusted, and rusted.

"Whoa! Pimp my ride!" Alvin cheered. Simon elbowed him in the ribs with a scowl. Padamay cleared her throat. "Uh, is this...all you have?"

"Yep," The employee said, popping his lips on the P. "Been havin' a lot of good sales lately. I'm about to run out of inventory."

"I bet you are," Brittany mumbered, recieving an elbow to the ribs by Jeanette.

...

"You okay, Toby?"

He didn't answer at first before turning to Simon. "I think I'm going to need your help with something, Si." The munk raised an eyebrow. "What do you know about inhansing car parts?"

"Alvin made us watch _Fast and Furious _with him. Does that count?"

"Close enough." Toby smirked.

...

Toby was then ingulfed in the biggest bear hug he had ever resieved, along with the chipmunks and chipettes. "THANK YOU! THANK YOU! THANK YOU!"

"But we didn't-" Theodore started.

"Shh, don't ruin the moment!" Alvin said.

...

_A fan-girl had pushed them forward with extreme force, and it didn't take much time for them to realize just to pull on the isles at the end to turn and gain speed. _

_"Hmm...'Best bread in town...'" He glanced at the loaf of bread in his other hand and read the lable. "'Best bread around.' In town...Around...Hmm.." _

_"WATCH OUT!"_

_Dave looked up, but not quick enough. All he saw was a shopping cart going full speed towards him and three certain chipmunks who were having the time of their lives until they saw who they were running over. _

_"ALLLLVVVV-"_

_Dave didn't have time to finish before he went lights out when the buggy met him._

_..._

Oh my gosh," Jeanette said, watching with wide eyes. Alvin nodded with a gulp. "Dudes...I think Claire's put a curse on Dave."

"Maybe she's an allian," Theodore whispered.

"Yeah," Eleanor muttered with a nod. "Maybe she's their leader...and she sucked out his brain..._through a straw!"_

The munks and chipettes gasped in horror, holding each other.

"Hey, wait a second," Simon said, pushing them all off, cutting the moment like a record scratch. "There are no such thing as allian's, Alvin." Alvin jabbed his pointer finger at Dave, hanging onto Theodore and shaking. "That's all the proof I need!"

...

"Love you, honey. See you at home. Be back by eight-thirty. Or your grounded." She clicked off her device.

"Oh no she didn't," Toby growled through his teeth.

"Go mom!" Padamay laughed as a few customers got up and left from the unprofessional outburst. About half of them had left. Padamay walked up beside Toby, and muttered, "There's a bathroom down that hall, to the left-"

"I KNOW!" He yelled in his high voice.

...

"Uh, Alvin?" She asked. "Are you...crying?" She raised her eyebrows. "NO!" Alvin retorted, sniffling and rubbing his eyes. "I just got some pollen in my eye...I have allergies!"

"Can chipmunks get allergies?" Jeanette asked Simon. "Apparently," He replied.

...

"Wow," He said, gazing at the cake. "That's...really impressive guys. What flavor is it?"

"." He heard all at once.

"It's a...special flavor," Eleanor said, half laughing.

"You don't even know, do you?"

"No, not really." She admitted.

...

Everyone groaned loudly. Dave turned around from the mirror. "Guys, is something wrong?"

"NOTHING!" Everyone screamed, making him jump. "I mean, uh," Padamay cleared her throat. "I was just getting the chipmunks and chipettes to...help me...uh..." She looked down at her heels. "Shine shoes!"

"Shine shoes?" Brittany mouthed.

"Yep," Simon played along, backing towards the door. "We're going to go shine some shoes. So...yeah." Everyone bailed at the same time, leaving Dave alone to talk to himself.

...

"Uh, okay when I say a word just say whatever pops into your head."

"Kay."

Simon thought before saying, "Potato." Alvin said, "Potato!" Simon's eyes narrowed behind his thick glasses. "Tomato."

"Tomato!"

Simon slapped his forehead. "Um, I think your supposed to say a different word that Simon, Alvin," Theodore said. Alvin rolled his eyes. "Fine, then you try it." Theodore shrugged and gave it a go.

"Potato," Simon said.

"Potahto."

"Tomato."

"Tomahto."

"Ugh!" Simon groaned, putting his head in his hands. "Guh..." Theodore tried with a raised eyebrow.

...

A game controller was placed in 's seat. Alvin raised an eyebrow before he heard Padamay's mother returning.

"Did ya get a hold of Dave?" She asked, taking a sip from her tea glass and walking over behind the desk.

"Huh?" Alvin stammered. "Oh, yeah. He's uh...having a real nice time." She smiled. "Oh good." Alvin chucked nervously, walking out towards the door. He heard pressing buttons then the sound of a character dying. "Yes!" She cheered in a whisper. _"MomMunk01 _wins!"

"NOOOO!" Toby cried from his room.

...

The chipmunks stared at the dog skeptically. Then Alvin blurted, "Did you pick that thing up on the side of the road?

...

He trailed off as he felt people staring at him. His face turned red and he coughed, rubbing the back of his neck. "Oh uh..." He cleared his throat. "Hey dudes." He laughed nervously at the munks. "Or little dudes, I guess I should say...what's up?"

_WOOF!_

Everyone froze. Toby slowly turned his gaze downward to the pile of pillows in the center of the room, which the chipmunks and chipettes were all sitting on. "S-Something wrong, Toby?" Simon asked.

Without warning the puppy burst through the barrier of pillows, wagging his tail happily and looking up at Toby. Toby screamed when the dog jumped out and dropped his Coke.

"Smooth." Brittany said.

...

"Brittany," He whispered.

_"Whaaaaat?" _She groaned, curling up and shutting her eyes tighter. "Yoshi's gone." He siad. "What?" Brittany repeated.

"Yoshi. Is. Gone."

Brittany jolted up, eyes swerving this way and that. "Well why didn't you say so?" She said, slapping him on the back of the head.

...

"Good morning Miss Seville," They all replied in unison.

She grinned wider. "I'm guessing my brother Dave keeps you boys pretty well trained to be so polite, eh?"

"Uh-huh."

"Yeah."

"Sure."

She giggled. Everything seemed okay before they heard Toby scream, "NO! HE IS NOT GOING IN MY ROOM!"

...

Many of the on-lookers gagged while Miss Seville simply stared in shock. She slowly looked up. "Kids," She said. "Who's your friend?"

Padamay looked down. "Yoshi," She muttered.

"And where did Yoshi come from?"

"...Convention."

"And you didn't tell me?"

"...He's shy..."

...

_"Well, you boys stay out of trouble," _Dave said. _"Me and Claire are going to an island ritural. It's said to bless couples for all eternity."_

"How's it work?"

_"I'm not sure. Some old island dude with a weird accent said that we had to give him two hundred bucks and meet him at some famous Hotel called, 'Ha` Susher.' Then he'll do the ritual. "_

"Wait..._Ha` Susher?"_ What was wrong with that name?

"HA! SUCKER!" Toby yelled as he beat Simon on a Wii game. Alivn replied slowly, "Um, Dave did you already pay him?"

_"Yeah, why?"_

Alvin sighed heavily, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Never mind Dave. Have fun on the rest of your Honeymoon. And...do me a favor?"

_"Yeah?"_

"Don't take anymore offers from Island Hippies."

**(A/N: Whew!)**

* * *

**Top Secret: 100 Ways to Annoy the 'Munks & 'Ettes**

Take his sweaters, dye them pink, and put 'I'm' and 'loser' next to the A.

...

Lock Alvin in the dishwasher when he takes his daily shower…IT'S GONNA BE HILIARIOUS! *Preview: Don'tcha wish your girlfr - HEY! I'M STUCK IN HERE!

...

Sing I believe I can fly, have a flying contest, spray paint a jetpack to be invisible, and watch Alvin fall to the ground.

...

Whenever Alvin says 'I'm the Alvinator' cut in and say 'Very small cat'. **(A/N: Seriously, fell out my chair!)**

...

Sing a remix of the cheese ball song until Alvin moves to Russia

...

Email Alvin with an email address he doesn't know and write: We're coming for you… HE'LL FREAK OUT!

...

When he realizes it's you, ring his doorbell and run for your life! HE'S GOT CLAWS, MAN!

...

Tell her Theodore thinks she's too pudgy over and over until she chases you into an abandoned building.

...

Tell her skinny jeans make her skinny and watch her struggle.

...

Leave a fake plate of cake and tie a fishing pole to the back of it…you get the dollar trick in your head, right?

...

Race her…you'll definitely win…unless you're Theodore…

...

Bring back Ian…this should annoy her.

...

Hide all her sweets and blame Ian…IT'S A WIN-WIN!

...

I gotta feeling that tonight's gonna be a good night…if you stop eating MY sweets and lose some weight… **(A/N: I KNOW this was cruel but I couldn't help but laugh! ChipetteGirl10 is funny!)**

...

Spend it up! On fruit, of course. **(A/N: Aha! Aha... Sorry Ellie...)**

...

_**Eleanor: WE'RE READING THIS!**_

...

SHE FOUND OUT! OH MY GOSH! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!

* * *

**The Chipmunk School**

"Do you have quesadillas to surprise us with then?" a chipette called out. "No, Jeanette," Kyle said. "She's not Jeanette, I am," Jeanette said.

"She's got the name Jeanette, too." "YOU KNOW I LIKE THE NAME VIOLET!" the chipette called out.

"Oh, be quiet, Violet," another chipette said. "Erika," Kyle warned. A chipette came running in the room.

"AM I LATE?" the chipette yelled. "Yes, Danielle," Kyle said. "GAAAGH!" the chipette named Danielle groaned. "It's okay. It's the first day," Kyle said.

"What? It's still school! First day or not!" _ANOTHER _chipette complained. "Chrissy! Oh my gosh, what is with girls?" Kyle said. "I know, right!" Alvin said. Brittany kicked him.

"He's right," a chipmunk said. "Thank you. Your name is?" Alvin asked. "I'm Kevin. I'm Chrissy's little brother," Kevin replied. Chrissy groaned at the mention of her name. "SHUT UP, KEV!"

Kevin and Alvin glanced behind them at Chrissy. She and Brittany high-fived and laughed. A chipette rolled her eyes.

"Guys…," she groaned. "Chill, Amelia," Chrissy said. "I go by Mia…," the chipette growled. Chrissy smirked.

"Chrissy, stop messing with her," a chipmunk said. "Yeah. I agree with Greg," Danielle said.

"Kyle, what's our class assignment?" another chipmunk piped up. "Well, Berry. I think-" "SHUT UP CHRISSY!" "YOU SHUT UP, ALVIN!"

"GUYS!" another chipmunk yelled. "Thank you, Dylan," Kyle said. There was silence. **(A/N: Yeah, the whole thing was funny...)**

...

"He did? (…) OH MY GOSH! (…) Ew…" Tina noticed the class watching. "GOTTA GO! BYE!" Tina turned to face the class. "Start reading…" She ran out the door.

"Man she's an awful teacher," Chrissy said. She closed her book.

"Chrissy, we're supposed to be reading," Kevin said. "Do I look like I care?" Chrissy said. "Well, no but-" "Then don't talk to me," Chrissy said. She fell asleep on her desk.

"Kevin, give me a black marker," Fifi said.

...

"Now I have to prepare for group two…," Mr. Butternut muttered. "Those are our boyfriends!" Nicki called on the way out.

"Oh man…," Mr. Butternut muttered. Then he smiled. "They won't tell them!" he said. "OH, WE WILL!" Eleanor called from the hall. Mr. Butternut's smile disappeared.

...

The bell rang. "Aw…I like this class," Alvin said. "Wow. If he likes math class, he really means it!" Simon said. "I think Jeff does, too. He's clinging to the desk…," Max said. "NO! I DON'T WANT TO LEAVE!" Jeff yelled as Miss Lisa pulled him off.

...

Tina walked in. "Today we'll talk about-" The bell rang. "-Nothing." The class scurried out. "Well, better prepare for group four." Her phone rang. "EEP! MY BOYFRIEND!"

...

"YOU BOYS ON THAT END OF THE GYM!" Mr. Butternut yelled. The boys ran. Their teacher pulled out dodge balls.

"Throw one and you'll need facial reconstruction," Alvin said. Mr. Butternut threw one anyway. Alvin took a running start. Jeff, Theodore, and Simon grabbed Alvin.

...

"True…I can manipulate her," Chad said. Brittany heard it and looked up. "I'M AN IDIOT?" she yelled. She slapped Chad. Alvin snickered…and then got slapped, too.

...

"WE'RE THROUGH ALVIN!" Brittany said, running out of the lunchroom. Alvin turned to Fifi. "You didn't do it purposely. Who forced you?" he asked. "Chrissy," Fifi stated. Alvin turned to Chrissy, who simply waved. "CHRISSY!" he yelled. Chrissy got up and ran.

"I'M GONNA KILL YOU!" Alvin yelled, chasing her. "Should we go after him?" Simon asked the group. There was a pause, and they broke into laughter.

...

"Alvin…tell me the truth, because Simon gave me a lie detector…," Brittany started. "What…?" Alvin asked.

...

"ATTAQUE!" Fifi yelled. "Huh?" Chrissy asked. Fifi slapped her forehead. "GET A FRENCH TO ENGLISH DICTIONARY! IT MEANS ATTACK!" Fifi yelled.

...

The rest stood there, bewildered.

"What just happened?" Chrissy asked. Dani slapped her. "GET HELP!" she yelled. Chrissy gave a look and walked away.

"Fifi, can we talk?" Chad asked with a devious grin. Fifi looked to Chad, and then Chrissy walking.

"CHRISSY, WAIT UP!" Fifi yelled. Chad grumbled - it_ was_ an attempt to kiss her. "Well, now to try and hit on Violet…" "DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT!" Chad rolled his eyes.

...

"LITTLE RAT…" "Please check the number, or try your call again," Chrissy said, a small smile forming on her face.

"I AM NOT ON A CELL PHONE," Mr. Butternut said. "Well then shut up, because I am!"

...

Chrissy dialed Mr. Butternut's number. His cell phone rang. "Hello?" "THIS IS YOUR BEST FRIEND KYLE, I SEE WHAT YOU'RE DOING TO THE POOR STUDENTS," Chrissy said, making her voice sound like Kyle's thanks to voice imitation classes.

"I-I didn't do anything…" "THE WALLS ARE CLOSING IN! RUN!" Chrissy said into the phone. Mr. Butternut started to run, and then looked at Chrissy. "Chrissy…" "Butterloser…" "IT'S BUTTERNUT!"

...

Chad was watching Fifi. "Now to make my move…," he mumbled. He snuck up behind Fifi and pulled her into a kiss - on the lips. He pulled away. "VICTORY!" "OH, YOU BETTER COURIR!" Fifi yelled. Chad took off running. Erika, Katie, and Kevin watched Chrissy run away from Mr. Butternut.

"RUN CHRISSY! I NEED YOUR ANNOYANCES!" Katie yelled.

...

"Somebody's in love…," Mia whispered to Greg. "A-am not!" Dani said. "In denial now, are we? Tsk, tsk, tsk." Dylan and Dani blushed. "I-I'm not in love with her…," Dylan. The door fell to the floor, to reveal Miss Lisa. "GUYS…" They cringed.

...

"Perfect. Now, I'm teacher. Today we learn why girls are attracted to me." Simon threw a book at Alvin.

"DETENTION!" Alvin shouted. "What? He didn't do anything!" Theodore said. "DOUBLE!" "But-," Scott began. "SHALL I MAKE IT TRIPLE?" Alvin threatened.

Simon walked up and grabbed Alvin by the collar of his shirt. "SHUT. UP!"

* * *

**The Rat Kill**

Alvin walked into the house and held up the rat by its tail.

''Dave... looky here, looky here. I killed the rat! I stomped it and beat it with a bat...''

Then he saw the preacher.

Alvin held the rat close to his chest and began to stroke its fur. He started to cry fake tears and looked over at the preacher.

''Then the lord called the poor thing home!'' **(A/N: Yeah...short story..)****The Chipmunk Newsroom**

* * *

"Great. It's worse than homework," Alvin complained. Julie went to the sink with a cup. "OH GOSH, NO!" Alvin said.

Julie took the cup of ice water and poured it on Alvin. He was soaked. "THAT'S IT! GIMME THE PHONE, I WANT A LAWYER!" he yelled.

...

"Hello and good evening! I'm Alvin Seville!" Alvin introduced. "And I'm Jeanette Seville. No, we're NOT related," Jeanette said.

Julie motioned for them to keep going. "It's been very stressful with stupid school and all, so kids, DROP OUT! SIGN UP FOR THE NAVY OR SOMETHING!" Alvin yelled. Julie slapped her forehead in frustration.

"Shut up, Alvin. Okay, let's go to Brittany Seville with weather," Jeanette said. Brittany was sitting in a director-style chair, filing her nails. "Oh, we're rolling?" she said as she saw the stares. Julie banged her head on a desk.

"This week there's a…wha-what's this? Oh, it's a hurricane! This week in Los Angeles there's a hurricane. Julie, am I right?" Julie took the hardest book she could find and knocked herself out. "I guess that's a no…um…Jeanette, cue Theodore and help me out here," Brittany said.

...

The camera went back onto Brittany, who had a paper in front of her now. "Okay. It's a high pressure system in Los Angeles. I thought the giant 'H' stood for hurricane. In New York there's a stationary front coming in, and - OH! - my time's up. See you in the next hour. Back to you, Jeanette."

...

"Here's my geeky, nerdy, and weird brother, Simon Seville with some breaking news," Alvin said. Julie, obviously having enough, chucked a rotten tomato and hit Alvin smack-dab in the face. "SERIOUSLY? I THOUGHT IT WAS ICE WATER!" Ice water splashed all over him. "YOU GET A PHONE CALL TONIGHT SAYING YOU DIE IN SEVEN DAYS!" Alvin yelled, storming off-set.

...

"I'M IN LOVE WITH SIMON! I'M TELLING BRITTANY!" Brittany came back. "OH, I HEARD IT ALRIGHT!" she yelled.

Brittany took Jeanette's place on Alvin and slapped him silly. "HOW DARE YOU TRY TO KISS HER!" Brittany said when she got up. Alvin had a goofy smile on his face. "You taste good…," he said.

Brittany and Jeanette glanced at each other, disgusted, and ran. Alvin was still on the floor…thinking about girls.

* * *

**You know what! I'm just gonna cut this story in half! My eyes are buring from staring at this computer for seven hours straight! And mabe these aren't the funniest moments of May 2010, more like the funniest moments sinse I got here!**

**And I wanted to put more up, but yesterday when I was working on it, the power went out all over the city and I lost EVERYTHING! **

**It may just be copying and pasting, but try having to search all of the humor stories and pick out the funniset moments! It really starts to wear you out!**

**So even though this is just SOME of the stories, mabe it will prepare you for the end of June! That way, I can start now with the stories JUST for June! lolz**

**But you are all awesome! Thanks for bringing laughs to Fanfiction! And I hope that you like this idea! Tell me if I should do it every month! I think it could be fun!**

**Oh yeah! And congrats if you made it through! I forgot how long it was! I hope you all got a good laugh out of this!**

**Till next time!**

**Review!**


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